My Smile is Real Now

By September 27, 2013Your Stories

I have always been seen as that”happy all the time girl” and I understand why, I act happy because that’s what everyone wants.

Last year was the hardest year of my life, it was the year I forgot who I was. I allowed my whole life to revolve on what my friend thought of me. I wanted her approval so badly. I was very depressed, because she pushed me away all the time. I always kept trying. I made myself believe I was a failure and that there was something wrong with me. My grades were low, I wore all black because she told me I didn’t look good in color. I even dressed how she wanted. I had to most struggle deciding who I was. It is so easy to forgot your identity. The saddest part is nobody even knew about my hurt, nobody know until this day. I spent so much time pretending I was always okay and smiling. I became a show. I was not real.
A year later she decided we were no longer friends and that was so relieving to me. I began to find myself and be myself again.

I learned a lot that year, and I thank God everyday for my life lesson. I see her in the hallways sometimes, I always smile at her. My smile is always real now. I wish her the best.

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